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Dealing with your post-intensive care state of mind

The suggestions on this page are not universal: only you know what's right for you. 

Some people have absolutely no desire to know what happened to them or to meet other patients. Others will want to immerse themselves in their diary and meet fellow ICU survivors very soon, while some will need more time—sometimes years—before they feel ready. Everyone must find what works best for them to move on and look to the future. 

Stressors Following Intensive Care

After a stay in the intensive care unit, there are many reasons why you might feel vulnerable and anxious:

 

  • You come to realize in a different way how vulnerable human beings are—and yourself in particular,
  • You have to relearn many things you used to take for granted (breathing, eating, walking, but also managing daily life, administrative tasks, and mental load)
  • You may move through several different hospital wards—new and unfamiliar worlds after intensive care—with new healthcare professionals who do not know you yet.
  • Returning home can be as anxiety-provoking as it is joyful—and sometimes both at once.

 

Testimony of Jean-Yves
The intensity of a second life

Read more testimonials in Second Life

Back to the outside world

It's common to feel anxious and worried after a stay in intensive care. Time will help you to overcome these emotions little by little, but you may find certain activities useful for improving your state of mind on a daily basis.

  • Perhaps you can try to resume some of the activities that soothed you before your hospitalization: you may not feel strong enough to resume them exactly as before, but you can find a way to adapt them to your level of fitness: if you used to run in nature, perhaps you can resume an activity that will allow you to combine the well-being of physical effort with the pleasure of nature?
 
  • Light physical exercise, such as walking or stretching, can go a long way towards improving your state of mind, but don't be too demanding on yourself: do what feels good, without forcing yourself. The progress you'll gradually see will also help you regain your self-confidence;
 
  • Getting out of the house, even to sit on a bench outside, can help effectively with ruminations.

Starting Over in Life

Returning to an independent life and facing the world outside the hospital can be a daunting step at times: it may be helpful to ask your friends and family for support as you navigate each of these new “firsts”: 

 

Managing Mental Load

You may find it difficult to organize your days at first—you might forget appointments or struggle to keep track of everything as well as you used to. Post-it notes, a calendar, and a notebook can be truly invaluable tools. Don’t hesitate to let the people you’re dealing with know and ask for their help—for example, ask for a reminder a few hours before a medical appointment.
Finding Your Way Around, Even at Home

It’s not uncommon to have trouble finding your belongings or remembering where they’re stored when you return home. You may also need to adjust your storage arrangements to accommodate what you can reach given your condition after rehabilitation.
Reusing Household Appliances

Your brain may have sorted out what’s essential from what’s secondary... You might have a momentary lapse of memory when you’re standing in front of the washing machine... but the internet can help you get through it with its many online user manuals—and it might also be helpful to have a loved one remind you how your appliances work.
Leaving the House

Especially for city dwellers, going back out onto the street or crossing a road can be difficult the first few times. Your loved ones might not necessarily think of this, and you might not have expected it either. Don’t hesitate to take your time and ask to not be alone. Also, plan ahead for the time it takes to get ready: gathering the things you need to bring, but also giving yourself time to feel mentally prepared.
Returning to the City

The city environment—with its noise, traffic, fast pace, and multitude of things to watch out for (cars, traffic lights, events, etc.)—can be difficult to handle all at once. If possible, try to take it slowly the first few times: go out for very short periods, accompanied by someone you trust.
Public Transportation

Taking the bus or subway on your own means traveling away from home and having to navigate transfers between lines: even a seasoned Parisian might find this daunting after long weeks in intensive care with self-confidence that’s a bit shaken. Some patients find it helpful to arrange to meet a loved one at the transfer point to help put their mind at ease.
Grocery Shopping

Going back to a large supermarket can be a little overwhelming: the bright lights, the background music, the announcements, the multitude of aisles where you can get lost—all of this can be confusing, tiring, and intense. Maybe it would be easier to start with smaller, more intimate stores the first few times?
Driving

No matter how skilled a driver you may have been before your stay in the intensive care unit, the idea of driving again might make you a little anxious. Depending on any cognitive side effects you may be experiencing or simply the fatigue thatintensive care, it’s probably a good idea to take your time, not drive alone the first few times, and perhaps simply ask a loved one to accompany you to help you get back into the swing of things—in a parking lot, for example, to start with. If no one in your circle drives, why not take one or two driving lessons?

Reclaiming your history

Among the means used to regain a sense of control over the situation, some patients feel the need to re-appropriate their history, to understand what happened during the intensive care phase, in particular the periods during which they were unconscious or in altered cognitive (mental) states. 

There are several ways to do this:

Ask Your Loved Ones

You can ask the loved ones who were with you during your stay in intensive care
Your ICU diary

In some units, healthcare providers encourage family members to keep an ICU diary their loved one’s stay in intensive care if this was the case for you, you’ll find a wealth of useful information in these collections
Writings by Your Loved Ones

Sometimes loved ones spontaneously decide to keep these journals or write in them for themselves, and they may be willing to share some of their writings with you
Message threads

Often, the loved ones of intensive care patients intensive care start a conversation on a messaging app to stay updated; you can ask for access to these conversations, which may help you find dates and facts
Talk to the team

You can schedule an appointment with the intensive care team intensive care they can explain what happened to you and your treatment plan
Return to the ICU

You can also ask to visit an intensive care room—perhaps your own, if it's available. This will allow you to see the environment in a new light.
intensive care Consultationintensive care

If your department offers aintensive care consultation, take advantage of these appointments to ask any questions you may have
Your Medical Records

You can also request your medical records from the hospital administration. Please note that medical records are a healthcare tool that may not always be easy to understand for people outside the medical field: if you decide to request your records, it may be helpful to make an appointment with a doctor to help you understand them.
The Second Life by 101 Network Second Life by 101

If you'd like to share your experiences with others who have been in intensive care, you can sign up for the Second Life network by clicking the link below

As you take steps to reclaim your history, take your time, state your limits and respect them. Stop when you feel things are getting difficult. Diving back into this period can be trying, emotional and distressing: protect yourself, there's never any urgency in diving back into this period. You can make another appointment later if the need arises. 

Consult a therapist?

Sometimes it's too hard to overcome anxiety alone. The experience you've had in intensive care is one of extreme stress for both body and mind. You've needed support to relearn simple acts such as breathing, eating, drinking and standing up, and you may still need physiotherapy? You can imagine that your mind, too, may need help to recover from this ordeal.

 

 

If you're having trouble letting go of your anxieties, if you're having trouble sleeping, if you're struggling to regain your self-confidence, if you're feeling negative emotions such as guilt, don't hesitate to ask for help: your GP will be able to answer any questions you may have, listen to you and help you, or refer you to a therapist suited to your situation.

 

Note: It’s not a sign of weakness to need help taking care of your mental health—especially not after what you’ve been through. Some studies show that a stay in intensive care an ordeal that can be comparable to what soldiers experience in war. The military organizes mental health rehabilitation camps for soldiers who have faced the most extreme situations. You have that right, too!

 

While you wait for a doctor's prescription that will allow you to receive covered treatment, you can turn to the"Mon Soutien Psy" program,whichentitles you to 12 sessions with a psychologist per year. 

Meet other people with similar experience

A stay in intensive care care is a difficult and unique experience, difficult to express, and it's not always easy to talk about it with those around you, including the loved ones who accompanied you during your stay. Your experiences are very different, and your experience as an intensive care care patient can be mixed with strange memories and recollections of dreams and nightmares that seem more real than reality itself. 

That’s why it can sometimes be helpful to talk about it with others who have been through intensive care. Gettingin touch with patient support groups can be a good way to openly discuss that period and help you realize that some of your emotions and strange memories are completely normal. You can ask your intensive care unit intensive care offers this type of meeting with former patients.

The social network Second Life also allows you to connect with other patients and their loved ones—which can be helpful in better understanding what the people who supported you have gone through—as well as with healthcare providers from other departments. You’ll also find numerous interviews and posts from the “Les REAnimés” committee, a dynamic patient group that will be happy to welcome you!